A Tear

I am sad because I long for those fleeting good times and I wish that I might get them back, so that I could make them better, stronger, happier - anything just to show how much I cherish them.  I wish I could bottle them up and just live that life. But the most precious... Continue Reading →

It is Time

~ Trigger Alert ~   I have never feared death. But yet I fear change. I feel the pain of loss and mourn those who have passed. Some I wish were still here.  Was it really their time to go? Death, our attitudes to it, well, that's a curious thing.  We like to pretend in... Continue Reading →

Howl

My heart howls It weeps for lost things It sighs for past things It beats, it loves My heart howls I'm not a Braveheart, a Lionheart I'm just an everyday heart I beat, I love My heart howls It clocks the shortening nights And wants to set everything to rights It beats, it loves My... Continue Reading →

Before My Time

I gasped, trying to clutch reality, trying to stop the world from completely slipping from my fingers.  I can do this, I tell myself.  I cannot believe otherwise.  If I do then where will it end?  The world, my world, my life, everything will fall away, it will be the crash of a tower of... Continue Reading →

Becoming a Parent

When do you become a parent?  Some go through heart-breaking agonies over countless years pursuing that very dream.  To others it's a surprise revelation, a shock, maybe something that they weren't planning on.  But most parents have a time period before the arrival to adjust, to plan, to adapt, to prepare.  For mammals, it's called... Continue Reading →

It’s Been a Bad, Bad, Bad Day

Where do I start? This morning? When I got up at ten to eight so I could be ready by half past nine only to discover that it was now, for reasons that I really can never fathom, actually TEN to NINE? I don't do mornings at the best of times. I am very slow... Continue Reading →

Loss of Self

(Can I tell you a secret? I grieve. There are moments when I am broken in spirit and overwhelmed by a profound sense of loss.  I try to remind myself that there are countless thousands, if not millions, of people who are in a worse position than I am but my heart won’t listen.  I... Continue Reading →

Testimony from a Bad Day

This is a post that I wrote many months ago when I was really struggling, it never got posted for some reason.  Today, I'm struggling again and fearing what that means. Whilst I cannot pick out the threads that Depression weaves through my life and thoughts, I am very aware of the limitations that ME... Continue Reading →

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